Who I Am
These are my true thoughts...
My Past
08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003
09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003
12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
Favorite Websites
albinoblacksheep.com
www.myspace.com
www.ebaumsworld.com
Credits of the Creator
Take a look at this & other blog designs @ Blogskins.com
Picture found @ Digital Blasphemy
Sunday, May 30, 2004
The Pencils and Pens Do Their Work Again
Earlier today I was working on my project and then the pc started lagging and wasn't working so I draw a little picture of part of a face. It just progressed from there... earlier this night I added a bunch of other things and cutouts and taped them all to my wall creating a face. I like doing collages and artsy stuff like that. I wished I had more time to do that stuff... the things I really love. Well I'm off to bed because Job's logging off and I don't want to stay up any longer because I'm feeling my immunity to sleep coming on and if I stay up any longer I won't be able to get to sleep.
Earlier today I was working on my project and then the pc started lagging and wasn't working so I draw a little picture of part of a face. It just progressed from there... earlier this night I added a bunch of other things and cutouts and taped them all to my wall creating a face. I like doing collages and artsy stuff like that. I wished I had more time to do that stuff... the things I really love. Well I'm off to bed because Job's logging off and I don't want to stay up any longer because I'm feeling my immunity to sleep coming on and if I stay up any longer I won't be able to get to sleep.
Mandy ~ 1:29 AM
Thursday, May 27, 2004
In Between and Out of It
I'm working on Democracy extra credit so I can cushion myself for a garenteed A. Right now I have a 92% which means I'm getting an A- and during the term it's dropped down to 90% so at least I haven't gotten any lower than the lowest A-. I've never really been very grade conscientious (yes, that's how it's spelt) but lately I've decided if I can get a really good grade I don't care if it means I have to bust my butt to achieve it. I'm searching around for articles to print out and write summaries on for extra credit. Even though each one is only worth 1 pt it makes a difference because the ciriculum is only based on around 400 pts which means less points equal more of the grade. Which also means my last project is worth 12.5% of my grade because it's worth 50 pts. Ms. Vick-Martini said we can raise our grade a full letter with as much extra credit as that requires which means all I have to do is keep up my A- and get A's on all of my tests and my final project and I'll get an A. Psh, all I have to do, yea right.
*sigh* If anyone's wondering why I'm blabbing about meaningless grades it's because I'm trying to keep my mind devoided from a particular topic at the moment. This morning I woke up to a lot of sirens. The sirens continued even until after I took my shower (considering it only lasted about 5 minutes because Ben and Kate both needed one too). I looked up at the hwy as I was getting dressed and I saw the lights flashing just past the renters' house. I told my mom and we both just assumed it was a car accident and so my mom called the renters to see if her kids were ok because our second thought was that they wait for the bus and they could've gotten hit by a car or something and we found out they were ok but the cars and ambulance were at our neighbors house. My mom called there immediately and Bonnie answered and told my mom that Charlie had passed away during the night and my mom started crying and freaking out and then I heard and I started bawling and Kate was crying too.
I just thought to myself, I've known that man almost my whole life. Ever since we moved up into the house on the hwy right next to them when I was about 3 years old until now. He'd always walk Molly, his collie(who died a couple of years ago and then he got a new collie)and I'd take Shadow out and talk to him or I'd help him pick up sticks so he could mow his lawn. I especially remembered the time lighting struck one of his trees and we all went over to his house and helped him clean up. My dad got out the chainsaw and cut down the damaged branch and we hauled it off. Every year he'd put up lights in an ornate display for Christmas. Charlie also gave us his paddle boat because he could no longer use it and he was so happy to know we loved it. He was always so nice to us and I loved talking to him.
So that is why I was tremendously upset today. I broke down in tears many times and I ended up leaving near the end of second hour because I couldn't stand being there and crying in front of everyone. Then I got really paranoid that they'd think it was something trivial like breaking up with Job although that isn't trivial to me it is to everyone else. I gave myself the worst headache and since I'm already sick the crying was really doing a job on my sinuses. I was so happy Job was there today for me. I told a few people and they were very understanding... Katie Barbian, Kayla, Kaitlin, Heather, and Bex all gave me hugs. I ended up telling Bex when I broke down in tears on my way to the office and the first thing he did was hug me which was pretty unexpected. After first hour I was sick of the sympathy/empathy and I just didn't want to keep dwelling on it there. Quite a few people saw me crying too like Job's entire German class, a bunch of people from my Oral Interp class, almost everyone in Wind Ensemble, and Concert Band, and random people in the halls. Kate also skipped her trip to Wausau 1st hour and attended Wind Ensemble with me.
Thanks for reading but I have to get back to my extra credit. Sooner or later I'm going to have to work on that project which includes a big visual aid, 5 minute speech, and answer topic questions from the group sheet. Although it's a group project we do absolutely nothing group related *shrugs* better that it's all up to me so I only have to do my work and not my groups.
I'm working on Democracy extra credit so I can cushion myself for a garenteed A. Right now I have a 92% which means I'm getting an A- and during the term it's dropped down to 90% so at least I haven't gotten any lower than the lowest A-. I've never really been very grade conscientious (yes, that's how it's spelt) but lately I've decided if I can get a really good grade I don't care if it means I have to bust my butt to achieve it. I'm searching around for articles to print out and write summaries on for extra credit. Even though each one is only worth 1 pt it makes a difference because the ciriculum is only based on around 400 pts which means less points equal more of the grade. Which also means my last project is worth 12.5% of my grade because it's worth 50 pts. Ms. Vick-Martini said we can raise our grade a full letter with as much extra credit as that requires which means all I have to do is keep up my A- and get A's on all of my tests and my final project and I'll get an A. Psh, all I have to do, yea right.
*sigh* If anyone's wondering why I'm blabbing about meaningless grades it's because I'm trying to keep my mind devoided from a particular topic at the moment. This morning I woke up to a lot of sirens. The sirens continued even until after I took my shower (considering it only lasted about 5 minutes because Ben and Kate both needed one too). I looked up at the hwy as I was getting dressed and I saw the lights flashing just past the renters' house. I told my mom and we both just assumed it was a car accident and so my mom called the renters to see if her kids were ok because our second thought was that they wait for the bus and they could've gotten hit by a car or something and we found out they were ok but the cars and ambulance were at our neighbors house. My mom called there immediately and Bonnie answered and told my mom that Charlie had passed away during the night and my mom started crying and freaking out and then I heard and I started bawling and Kate was crying too.
I just thought to myself, I've known that man almost my whole life. Ever since we moved up into the house on the hwy right next to them when I was about 3 years old until now. He'd always walk Molly, his collie(who died a couple of years ago and then he got a new collie)and I'd take Shadow out and talk to him or I'd help him pick up sticks so he could mow his lawn. I especially remembered the time lighting struck one of his trees and we all went over to his house and helped him clean up. My dad got out the chainsaw and cut down the damaged branch and we hauled it off. Every year he'd put up lights in an ornate display for Christmas. Charlie also gave us his paddle boat because he could no longer use it and he was so happy to know we loved it. He was always so nice to us and I loved talking to him.
So that is why I was tremendously upset today. I broke down in tears many times and I ended up leaving near the end of second hour because I couldn't stand being there and crying in front of everyone. Then I got really paranoid that they'd think it was something trivial like breaking up with Job although that isn't trivial to me it is to everyone else. I gave myself the worst headache and since I'm already sick the crying was really doing a job on my sinuses. I was so happy Job was there today for me. I told a few people and they were very understanding... Katie Barbian, Kayla, Kaitlin, Heather, and Bex all gave me hugs. I ended up telling Bex when I broke down in tears on my way to the office and the first thing he did was hug me which was pretty unexpected. After first hour I was sick of the sympathy/empathy and I just didn't want to keep dwelling on it there. Quite a few people saw me crying too like Job's entire German class, a bunch of people from my Oral Interp class, almost everyone in Wind Ensemble, and Concert Band, and random people in the halls. Kate also skipped her trip to Wausau 1st hour and attended Wind Ensemble with me.
Thanks for reading but I have to get back to my extra credit. Sooner or later I'm going to have to work on that project which includes a big visual aid, 5 minute speech, and answer topic questions from the group sheet. Although it's a group project we do absolutely nothing group related *shrugs* better that it's all up to me so I only have to do my work and not my groups.
Mandy ~ 6:08 PM
Tuesday, May 18, 2004
The Opera I Don't Know
I have this french opera song stuck in my head and all I can do is sing 'ahs' to it. It's from this movie I watched a few weeks ago on Fox Family (channel 18 here) called 'Brave New Girl'. It's a pretty decent movie but I didn't like the ending that much, it really left it hanging.
Today after school I went to a board meeting sort of because Kate was going to talk at it about this poster that glorified war and how it should be taken down because it sends kids the wrong message about killing people. The guy who flew a plan was quoted saying it was 'fun' and that was in reference to the type of plane which he flew which dropped uranium on Afghanistan to corrupt their land for life and it's proven that because of the uranium our pilots dropped on them every 1 in 4 babies is born with a birth defect. This was only part of the speech Mr. Van der puy stated. When Kate gave her speech about how someone she loved (Jeff) left for the 'honor' of it I looked over at my mom (was was bawling) and I couldn't stop the tears from running down my face.
I also had my first day of act prep today because I missed it yesterday. It was really easy. Kate, Mike, Job, and I all sat together and did all of the math problems and tomorrow I'm guessing it's going to be more math that's a lot harder because the problems we got today Kate and I had absolutely no problem solving although Mike and Job were having slight problems. Mike was just taking Kate's answers :p.
I've been very elated lately and it's a nice change from always feeling depressed. It's almost the end of the school year, about 11.5 school days left! Well I'm going to get going because my mom's on the phone and she said she'd be off the phone in a minute she's been on it for half an hour! I'm sorry Job, I guess I'll see you tomorrow :(
I have this french opera song stuck in my head and all I can do is sing 'ahs' to it. It's from this movie I watched a few weeks ago on Fox Family (channel 18 here) called 'Brave New Girl'. It's a pretty decent movie but I didn't like the ending that much, it really left it hanging.
Today after school I went to a board meeting sort of because Kate was going to talk at it about this poster that glorified war and how it should be taken down because it sends kids the wrong message about killing people. The guy who flew a plan was quoted saying it was 'fun' and that was in reference to the type of plane which he flew which dropped uranium on Afghanistan to corrupt their land for life and it's proven that because of the uranium our pilots dropped on them every 1 in 4 babies is born with a birth defect. This was only part of the speech Mr. Van der puy stated. When Kate gave her speech about how someone she loved (Jeff) left for the 'honor' of it I looked over at my mom (was was bawling) and I couldn't stop the tears from running down my face.
I also had my first day of act prep today because I missed it yesterday. It was really easy. Kate, Mike, Job, and I all sat together and did all of the math problems and tomorrow I'm guessing it's going to be more math that's a lot harder because the problems we got today Kate and I had absolutely no problem solving although Mike and Job were having slight problems. Mike was just taking Kate's answers :p.
I've been very elated lately and it's a nice change from always feeling depressed. It's almost the end of the school year, about 11.5 school days left! Well I'm going to get going because my mom's on the phone and she said she'd be off the phone in a minute she's been on it for half an hour! I'm sorry Job, I guess I'll see you tomorrow :(
Mandy ~ 10:12 PM
Thursday, May 13, 2004
The Orchestra In My Head...
Plays it's notes again with what I've learned and what I know and for it so little I have to show...
I just made that up as an intro. So much is going on lately and I find it hard to keep up with myself let alone all of my friends and family. Kate's birthday was yesterday and she's having a party on the 22nd of which that night there's the play at the RHS and Job's Night of Jazz at Crystal Rock. Chris is really upset and I haven't really had the time to talk to him and I just found he was upset from reading his blogger. I'm almost completely sure he was talking about Katie. *sigh* I'm just so enfatuated with my life and most of all Job that it's hard to keep up with the 'current events'.
Today I was bothered all day because I knew there was something I was forgetting about and I just remembered that it was Job's and my 3 month. With that came another realization that we've been together longer than any other relationship I've ever had that was serious at least. My dad keeps hinting to me about marriage and tonight he said 'Just think, if you get married now and you live to be 100 you'll be married for 80 years and for the last 40 you'll wish you were dead' and then I said 'You know this from personal experience?' and he cynically smiled and replied 'yes' and I was like 'That's mean' and then we got into this whole huge thing about how he has to keep living until he's taught me how to take care of myself because if it were up to my mom she'd take care of me until I died. My dad also inquires about what Job plans on being when he grows up and other rather personal and/or intrusive questions like he's trying to make sure I'll have a good man when he leaves me. *sighs again* I don't especially enjoy the topic of my parents dying but it's going to happen and I'll have to accept it no matter how much I won't want to. Right now he's helping me out with my homework and I've been down here a while so I'm going to go see if he could find what I was looking for to help me.
Plays it's notes again with what I've learned and what I know and for it so little I have to show...
I just made that up as an intro. So much is going on lately and I find it hard to keep up with myself let alone all of my friends and family. Kate's birthday was yesterday and she's having a party on the 22nd of which that night there's the play at the RHS and Job's Night of Jazz at Crystal Rock. Chris is really upset and I haven't really had the time to talk to him and I just found he was upset from reading his blogger. I'm almost completely sure he was talking about Katie. *sigh* I'm just so enfatuated with my life and most of all Job that it's hard to keep up with the 'current events'.
Today I was bothered all day because I knew there was something I was forgetting about and I just remembered that it was Job's and my 3 month. With that came another realization that we've been together longer than any other relationship I've ever had that was serious at least. My dad keeps hinting to me about marriage and tonight he said 'Just think, if you get married now and you live to be 100 you'll be married for 80 years and for the last 40 you'll wish you were dead' and then I said 'You know this from personal experience?' and he cynically smiled and replied 'yes' and I was like 'That's mean' and then we got into this whole huge thing about how he has to keep living until he's taught me how to take care of myself because if it were up to my mom she'd take care of me until I died. My dad also inquires about what Job plans on being when he grows up and other rather personal and/or intrusive questions like he's trying to make sure I'll have a good man when he leaves me. *sighs again* I don't especially enjoy the topic of my parents dying but it's going to happen and I'll have to accept it no matter how much I won't want to. Right now he's helping me out with my homework and I've been down here a while so I'm going to go see if he could find what I was looking for to help me.
Mandy ~ 9:23 PM
Friday, May 07, 2004
I *sigh* Again
I just read Emily's blogger and I'm working my way down the list. Part of what she wrote...
One reason I've been annoyed because anytime I say anything perverted everyone gives me weird look and calls me a pervert and hits me or something. Am I really that gross....or is it just that much more disgusting coming from me? Because Im pretty sure I'm tame compared to some of the things you guys come up with. So I don't understand. I'm not really like that.
I have never been suprised/disgusted/anything to those remarks she makes because everyone else makes them too. Hell, I make them and sometimes I play along and tell her what a sexy beast she is just because it's fun. *shrugs* Anyone who does react in such a manner as to be disgusted by such thoughts that aren't perverted because they're human nature is a hipocrit. (By the way perverted means anything that isn't humanly natural and that would be, for instance, having sex with dead people, being a necropheliac or a dendro- is perverted, that second one is sex with trees).
On another note Emily brought up in her blogger. Lets see here... oh yes...
So I feel like...I feel like no guy is ever going to love me again and it is a depressing thought. But then again, I look on the other side and I'm like well, if I had a boyfriend of some sort, they'd always get in the way or well more of they'd hold me back from things I really wanted to, or should be doing. And they cause one way too much anxiety. More than it's worth. But you know, a person really can get lonely when she has to see all her friends all over each 24/7. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying. So yeah. There is also a few other complexitys thrown in there that suck butt and I wish I'd just solve them.
I'm sorry you feel that way and I really wished there was some way I could help you but there really isn't. All I can say is just let things happen and fall where they may. I'm extremely lucky and I'm not going to let one moment of it pass me by because I already have multiple times. Some things say never let one moment pass you by others say never dump your friends for your bf and yet others say... well a lot of things and you know what? It's impossible to accomplish all of that because for one to never let one moment pass you by would be insanity and I pass moments by to make other moments and it's rather confusing and I'm sure I've lost half of my readers right there so I'll stop.
In the past week I've been in the paper twice. I was in the paper for Presidential Physical Fitness and then today I was in there for singing for Improvamalooza. I'm singing Proud Mary with Alise Boehm, Heather Maas, and Kim Beigal. I'm really nervous and not for myself but because Kim's tone deaf and for one Jeb said today 4th hour her voice made the group look horrible because she has a solo, we all do and I have no idea what to do because Heather and Alise are just wonderful and then there's Kim. It makes me feel absolutely horrible to say this too so I'm going to stop, yet another topic.
Today 4th hour was hilarious because we've had Mrs. Storm as our substitute for the past few days because Vick-Martini is gone at Mach Trial State. Well today Nessa was complaining that she was starving and Storm handed out our tests and she told us not to cheat and then she walked out the door. Of course everyone cheated and a couple of minutes later she walked back in with 2 trays of food. Buffet food, meats and cheeses and buns and raw vegis and dip and everyone chowed down. I didn't eat anything because I was happily chewing on my gum and I wasn't hungry. I still thought it was really nice of her and hilarious because she's like 60 and she's pretty eccentric and she said in a really sneaky tone 'I kiefed them from the teachers lounge' with an evil little laugh. Everyone in the class broke out in histarics. We did absolutely nothing, took a test and then we worked on homework that's due Monday and in between talking for the hour we had left I almost completed the assignment. I wished school were always like 4th hour today but then I probably wouldn't appreciate it enough.
*sigh* I need to vent and this time it isn't bad... I love Job and it's killing me. I feel like I can't express my love for him enough and just being in his arms completely relieves me but for only that moment in time. I obsess about him so much and especially when he's around me and he loves it. Most guys would be embarassed and tell me to stop it or they'd break up with me but Job... he's just wonderful. He actually reciprocates the love I express and besides that I've never loved anyone as much as I love Job. Not even Matt! That's going to shock a few who read this. I can almost hear the *gasps* right now.
Even though a lot of people around me are depressed especially friends :( I can't help being so happy even though I still get moody. I'm really worrying about Kayla and today after school she broke down in tears after telling me how she's been feeling and responding to everything. She seems seriously depressed and I think it would be in her best interest to seek help because I know in the past I've wanted to because there were thoughts... but I'm not saying Kayla's having those thoughts but just that she's extremely rangy and upset alot. Well I think I've been skitzophrenic enough in this blogger, I'll save some for later ;P.
I just read Emily's blogger and I'm working my way down the list. Part of what she wrote...
One reason I've been annoyed because anytime I say anything perverted everyone gives me weird look and calls me a pervert and hits me or something. Am I really that gross....or is it just that much more disgusting coming from me? Because Im pretty sure I'm tame compared to some of the things you guys come up with. So I don't understand. I'm not really like that.
I have never been suprised/disgusted/anything to those remarks she makes because everyone else makes them too. Hell, I make them and sometimes I play along and tell her what a sexy beast she is just because it's fun. *shrugs* Anyone who does react in such a manner as to be disgusted by such thoughts that aren't perverted because they're human nature is a hipocrit. (By the way perverted means anything that isn't humanly natural and that would be, for instance, having sex with dead people, being a necropheliac or a dendro- is perverted, that second one is sex with trees).
On another note Emily brought up in her blogger. Lets see here... oh yes...
So I feel like...I feel like no guy is ever going to love me again and it is a depressing thought. But then again, I look on the other side and I'm like well, if I had a boyfriend of some sort, they'd always get in the way or well more of they'd hold me back from things I really wanted to, or should be doing. And they cause one way too much anxiety. More than it's worth. But you know, a person really can get lonely when she has to see all her friends all over each 24/7. I'm not complaining, I'm just saying. So yeah. There is also a few other complexitys thrown in there that suck butt and I wish I'd just solve them.
I'm sorry you feel that way and I really wished there was some way I could help you but there really isn't. All I can say is just let things happen and fall where they may. I'm extremely lucky and I'm not going to let one moment of it pass me by because I already have multiple times. Some things say never let one moment pass you by others say never dump your friends for your bf and yet others say... well a lot of things and you know what? It's impossible to accomplish all of that because for one to never let one moment pass you by would be insanity and I pass moments by to make other moments and it's rather confusing and I'm sure I've lost half of my readers right there so I'll stop.
In the past week I've been in the paper twice. I was in the paper for Presidential Physical Fitness and then today I was in there for singing for Improvamalooza. I'm singing Proud Mary with Alise Boehm, Heather Maas, and Kim Beigal. I'm really nervous and not for myself but because Kim's tone deaf and for one Jeb said today 4th hour her voice made the group look horrible because she has a solo, we all do and I have no idea what to do because Heather and Alise are just wonderful and then there's Kim. It makes me feel absolutely horrible to say this too so I'm going to stop, yet another topic.
Today 4th hour was hilarious because we've had Mrs. Storm as our substitute for the past few days because Vick-Martini is gone at Mach Trial State. Well today Nessa was complaining that she was starving and Storm handed out our tests and she told us not to cheat and then she walked out the door. Of course everyone cheated and a couple of minutes later she walked back in with 2 trays of food. Buffet food, meats and cheeses and buns and raw vegis and dip and everyone chowed down. I didn't eat anything because I was happily chewing on my gum and I wasn't hungry. I still thought it was really nice of her and hilarious because she's like 60 and she's pretty eccentric and she said in a really sneaky tone 'I kiefed them from the teachers lounge' with an evil little laugh. Everyone in the class broke out in histarics. We did absolutely nothing, took a test and then we worked on homework that's due Monday and in between talking for the hour we had left I almost completed the assignment. I wished school were always like 4th hour today but then I probably wouldn't appreciate it enough.
*sigh* I need to vent and this time it isn't bad... I love Job and it's killing me. I feel like I can't express my love for him enough and just being in his arms completely relieves me but for only that moment in time. I obsess about him so much and especially when he's around me and he loves it. Most guys would be embarassed and tell me to stop it or they'd break up with me but Job... he's just wonderful. He actually reciprocates the love I express and besides that I've never loved anyone as much as I love Job. Not even Matt! That's going to shock a few who read this. I can almost hear the *gasps* right now.
Even though a lot of people around me are depressed especially friends :( I can't help being so happy even though I still get moody. I'm really worrying about Kayla and today after school she broke down in tears after telling me how she's been feeling and responding to everything. She seems seriously depressed and I think it would be in her best interest to seek help because I know in the past I've wanted to because there were thoughts... but I'm not saying Kayla's having those thoughts but just that she's extremely rangy and upset alot. Well I think I've been skitzophrenic enough in this blogger, I'll save some for later ;P.
Mandy ~ 5:17 PM
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
Predictions and Contradictions
I don't really know about the contradictions but it rhymed with predictions so here goes...
Here is your horoscope for Sunday, May 2:
Just one more day of using your innate gift for restoring balance, and then
you're off duty. In the meantime, keep at it. If you resolve this latest
dispute, you'll rest easier -- and enjoy the rest of the weekend.
I find that funny because the next day Chris and I resolved the scrap we had that lasted a school week which was pretty long because I have 1st hour with him (90 minutes every day) and then I see him in between classes and after school.
Last night I had play practice and I'm now actually appearing on the stage *gasps* What an honor *rolls eyes* I was going to tell Cupp that I was quitting but when I thought about it I really couldn't because Job was there all alone. The only other person he knows there is Heather and that's just because of me and to my knowledge they don't really talk but Heather informed me they did the first night of play practice which was a huge relief because I felt so horrible that I'd gotten so sick after I came home from school.
This past school week my oral interp class has been practicing our skits for Improvamaloosa. I dropped my singing solo because I couldn't find a kareoke version of it. I'm still in the Frodags skit and Heather has informed me that instead of wearing a wig I'm going to be frizzing out my hair which I really don't like because my hair is already crap because I don't eat meat and now I'm going to kill it some more with tons of hair products and reverse combing *cringes* This better be good although Kim's tone deaf and we all have solos. Well I'm going to go dl the song so I can practice it. I'm also nervous because Beka and her band, the Moving Sidewalks are going to be performing and that means most likely Job's mom will be there. We have to do this act although I don't really want to and I'm just learning the song so in one week I'll perform it which is actually more like 4 days now.
I don't really know about the contradictions but it rhymed with predictions so here goes...
Here is your horoscope for Sunday, May 2:
Just one more day of using your innate gift for restoring balance, and then
you're off duty. In the meantime, keep at it. If you resolve this latest
dispute, you'll rest easier -- and enjoy the rest of the weekend.
I find that funny because the next day Chris and I resolved the scrap we had that lasted a school week which was pretty long because I have 1st hour with him (90 minutes every day) and then I see him in between classes and after school.
Last night I had play practice and I'm now actually appearing on the stage *gasps* What an honor *rolls eyes* I was going to tell Cupp that I was quitting but when I thought about it I really couldn't because Job was there all alone. The only other person he knows there is Heather and that's just because of me and to my knowledge they don't really talk but Heather informed me they did the first night of play practice which was a huge relief because I felt so horrible that I'd gotten so sick after I came home from school.
This past school week my oral interp class has been practicing our skits for Improvamaloosa. I dropped my singing solo because I couldn't find a kareoke version of it. I'm still in the Frodags skit and Heather has informed me that instead of wearing a wig I'm going to be frizzing out my hair which I really don't like because my hair is already crap because I don't eat meat and now I'm going to kill it some more with tons of hair products and reverse combing *cringes* This better be good although Kim's tone deaf and we all have solos. Well I'm going to go dl the song so I can practice it. I'm also nervous because Beka and her band, the Moving Sidewalks are going to be performing and that means most likely Job's mom will be there. We have to do this act although I don't really want to and I'm just learning the song so in one week I'll perform it which is actually more like 4 days now.
Mandy ~ 7:14 PM
Monday, May 03, 2004
Forgiveness
I just read Chris's blogger because I've been grounded and as soon as Sarah walks in here and realizes I ninja-ed her pc she'll kill me. Few updates, Oral Interp is putting on a variaty show called Improvamaloosa on Sunday for mother's day. I will be performing in that... maybe two acts. Then secondly Chris... I had no idea what I did to you to make me so mad but after reading your blogger I realized you're not having the best time.
i dun wanna be an ass like andy, and have everyone hate me, im sorry amanda...im sorry katie...and emily...you 3 specifically...i know i treat you guys like shit and you are always just trying to help me...
amanda, im sorry that i was an asshole that night...i dunno what it was...but all that shit you said wasnt true, i never want you to get hurt, or die, or mildly displeasured even...but i was just having a wonderful night obviously and i decided to take it out on you.
I really don't know what's going on with you but I hope you feel better. I really don't want to annoy you anymore by getting into your business, just where I shouldn't be. I really don't know what to do anyway... even with myself.
Job, thank you for standing by me even when I feel like crap and I'm mean and you're just the biggest sweetie and I can't wait until we get to actually hang out instead of all of this coincidental crap like solo ensomble. I'm so sorry I didn't go to the play practice tonight. I was so sick when I got home from school that I took 2 ibprofen and passed out. I feel absolutely horrible that I tried to go and was getting ready but I couldn't even stand up and my mom wouldn't let me go. She said she was going to take me to the drs. but I think I talked her out of it. I love you all and goodnight before I get caught.
I just read Chris's blogger because I've been grounded and as soon as Sarah walks in here and realizes I ninja-ed her pc she'll kill me. Few updates, Oral Interp is putting on a variaty show called Improvamaloosa on Sunday for mother's day. I will be performing in that... maybe two acts. Then secondly Chris... I had no idea what I did to you to make me so mad but after reading your blogger I realized you're not having the best time.
i dun wanna be an ass like andy, and have everyone hate me, im sorry amanda...im sorry katie...and emily...you 3 specifically...i know i treat you guys like shit and you are always just trying to help me...
amanda, im sorry that i was an asshole that night...i dunno what it was...but all that shit you said wasnt true, i never want you to get hurt, or die, or mildly displeasured even...but i was just having a wonderful night obviously and i decided to take it out on you.
I really don't know what's going on with you but I hope you feel better. I really don't want to annoy you anymore by getting into your business, just where I shouldn't be. I really don't know what to do anyway... even with myself.
Job, thank you for standing by me even when I feel like crap and I'm mean and you're just the biggest sweetie and I can't wait until we get to actually hang out instead of all of this coincidental crap like solo ensomble. I'm so sorry I didn't go to the play practice tonight. I was so sick when I got home from school that I took 2 ibprofen and passed out. I feel absolutely horrible that I tried to go and was getting ready but I couldn't even stand up and my mom wouldn't let me go. She said she was going to take me to the drs. but I think I talked her out of it. I love you all and goodnight before I get caught.
Mandy ~ 9:50 PM
Saturday, May 01, 2004
Need More Time
To write in my blogger that is because everytime I try to write something something else comes up. Here's my horoscope of which I can't quite make out. I think it's referring to a certain someone of whom I've recently stopped being friends with. Well he doesn't care that we aren't friends anymore so I guess I'll just leave that be.
Here is your horoscope for Saturday, May 1:
It's time to get all those feelings you've been trying to hide right out in the
open. Forget being nice. Let it out. How long can you go on sugarcoating what
you really mean to say?
Today was state solo ensomble and it wasn't as good as last year and that's probably because it was at the highschool instead of the college and nothing was marked. There were hardly any signs and I missed almost all of my friend's events. I got 2 1sts (woodwind choir and duet) and 1 2nd (trio). Job got a first for jazz ensomble, which was really good. He also saved my life because we were sitting in the gym and some kids from another school were playing frisbee and one throw went for my temple and I could have died (not like the chance was 1:1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000) but Job (with his super fast reflexes) shot his hand up and saved my head. One of the guys playing frisbee remarked "That's it we're done. You almost killed her but they had a moment when he saved her life" It was really funny.
Kayla got really pissed and actually bitched at me after I said Jake was being dumb she said "Amanda, you don't want to make me mad right now" and I'm like fine, sorry. Then she walked ahead of us and I'm like grrrrrrrrrr to Job. Job also bought me a rose even though it partially died before we got home.
I went to the talent show Friday to see Beka (she kicked ass, Go Beka!) and her band. Mmm, then Job and I tried out for the play and he got male understudy for all of the parts and I'm the spotlight/painter/set crap crappity crap crap. I'm glad I didn't get a part though because there are a lot of lines for every part. There isn't a lead role and there isn't any singing either which was thoroughly disappointing but I do know Vixy got the part of the valley girl ummm (bad memory) but she's going to play the part so well because she can really imitate it. Hehe.
Mmmm. I can't really think of anything else to write about but if I do I'll make sure to write when it happens or when I get back to it I forget everything about it and it's just not the same.
To write in my blogger that is because everytime I try to write something something else comes up. Here's my horoscope of which I can't quite make out. I think it's referring to a certain someone of whom I've recently stopped being friends with. Well he doesn't care that we aren't friends anymore so I guess I'll just leave that be.
Here is your horoscope for Saturday, May 1:
It's time to get all those feelings you've been trying to hide right out in the
open. Forget being nice. Let it out. How long can you go on sugarcoating what
you really mean to say?
Today was state solo ensomble and it wasn't as good as last year and that's probably because it was at the highschool instead of the college and nothing was marked. There were hardly any signs and I missed almost all of my friend's events. I got 2 1sts (woodwind choir and duet) and 1 2nd (trio). Job got a first for jazz ensomble, which was really good. He also saved my life because we were sitting in the gym and some kids from another school were playing frisbee and one throw went for my temple and I could have died (not like the chance was 1:1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000) but Job (with his super fast reflexes) shot his hand up and saved my head. One of the guys playing frisbee remarked "That's it we're done. You almost killed her but they had a moment when he saved her life" It was really funny.
Kayla got really pissed and actually bitched at me after I said Jake was being dumb she said "Amanda, you don't want to make me mad right now" and I'm like fine, sorry. Then she walked ahead of us and I'm like grrrrrrrrrr to Job. Job also bought me a rose even though it partially died before we got home.
I went to the talent show Friday to see Beka (she kicked ass, Go Beka!) and her band. Mmm, then Job and I tried out for the play and he got male understudy for all of the parts and I'm the spotlight/painter/set crap crappity crap crap. I'm glad I didn't get a part though because there are a lot of lines for every part. There isn't a lead role and there isn't any singing either which was thoroughly disappointing but I do know Vixy got the part of the valley girl ummm (bad memory) but she's going to play the part so well because she can really imitate it. Hehe.
Mmmm. I can't really think of anything else to write about but if I do I'll make sure to write when it happens or when I get back to it I forget everything about it and it's just not the same.
Mandy ~ 7:33 PM