Who I Am
These are my true thoughts...
My Past
08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003
09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003
12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
Favorite Websites
albinoblacksheep.com
www.myspace.com
www.ebaumsworld.com
Credits of the Creator
Take a look at this & other blog designs @ Blogskins.com
Picture found @ Digital Blasphemy
Thursday, April 22, 2004
Impartial to Me
I've noticed there are a lot of unfinished and skimpy thoughts as of recently. Since gym I haven't been able to think as well and my thought process has completely left me. I know why too, excercising increases brain activity because it increases blood flow to the brain and it's proven that you learn and memorize and remember things much easier if you excercise regularly. Since gym I've been wanting to work out but I can't seem to find the time and last night I was going to blow dry my hair after my shower but Sarah popped in there and I did some sit ups and I actually did 61 crunches in a minute. I was looking at the clock over the back of the couch and laying off the side with my legs at a 90 degree angle over the back of the couch and then going up to me knees. I could feel the burn, hehe.
So I'm talking to Chris right now and a subject that has come up before (as in a convo with Emily) has come up with him.
~Mandy~ says:
well maybe i'll just make a new blogger and keep it all to myself
~Mandy~ says:
not like anyone would know anyway
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, what would be the point of that? just to come on here and say hey! i wrote in my blogger but you cant read it
~Mandy~ says:
yup
~Mandy~ says:
you know how much i have to edit it? and when sometimes i have such strong feelings and i can't write about them because people would complain
~Mandy~ says:
i hate having to edit my own feelings
~Mandy~ says:
you know what i'm talking about or no?
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
hah, do i know what your talking about...of course!
~Mandy~ says:
ok... then writing in a blogger of which no one had would be my true feelings, what i write now is like a watered down and summerized version of everything i feel
~Mandy~ says:
every time i write in my blogger i go through my head and remember everyone who has access to it and then i say to every statement, would this offend them? and sometimes i use it against them like if i'm mad at them i may purposely post something to triggure it which is mean but when you're mad at someone you want to get revenge no matter who you are
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
ya...
~Mandy~ says:
and i don't like doing that
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, but when your mad at someone it feels oh so good
~Mandy~ says:
yes but then i think about how later they'll read it and be hurt or even more angry... and i know i'd feel just as good if i just wrote it down somewhere and no one could see it but me
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, ok, then me and you obviously dont see eye to eye on that
~Mandy~ says:
talk to me
~Mandy~ says:
you like them knowing what you think
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
yeah, thats what i always thought the point of a blog was
~Mandy~ says:
yea... which is one of the reasons i don't do what i just suggested
Sometimes I wish I could have this one place that no one knew about so I could just go there to be alone. I never get to be alone, ever and I don't even have my own room. In this house I feel like nothing I own is truely mine and mostly because of the privacy issue and that I've never bought anything with my own money because I don't really have my own money because I've never had a job. I even feel as though my bank account shouldn't be mine because my parents started it and since I've put birthday money in there every year. I think if I really want to find my own identity or something that's just mine I should get a job. Well I guess there's another reason I'm getting kicked off, to more impartial blogs! Ben's home.
I've noticed there are a lot of unfinished and skimpy thoughts as of recently. Since gym I haven't been able to think as well and my thought process has completely left me. I know why too, excercising increases brain activity because it increases blood flow to the brain and it's proven that you learn and memorize and remember things much easier if you excercise regularly. Since gym I've been wanting to work out but I can't seem to find the time and last night I was going to blow dry my hair after my shower but Sarah popped in there and I did some sit ups and I actually did 61 crunches in a minute. I was looking at the clock over the back of the couch and laying off the side with my legs at a 90 degree angle over the back of the couch and then going up to me knees. I could feel the burn, hehe.
So I'm talking to Chris right now and a subject that has come up before (as in a convo with Emily) has come up with him.
~Mandy~ says:
well maybe i'll just make a new blogger and keep it all to myself
~Mandy~ says:
not like anyone would know anyway
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, what would be the point of that? just to come on here and say hey! i wrote in my blogger but you cant read it
~Mandy~ says:
yup
~Mandy~ says:
you know how much i have to edit it? and when sometimes i have such strong feelings and i can't write about them because people would complain
~Mandy~ says:
i hate having to edit my own feelings
~Mandy~ says:
you know what i'm talking about or no?
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
hah, do i know what your talking about...of course!
~Mandy~ says:
ok... then writing in a blogger of which no one had would be my true feelings, what i write now is like a watered down and summerized version of everything i feel
~Mandy~ says:
every time i write in my blogger i go through my head and remember everyone who has access to it and then i say to every statement, would this offend them? and sometimes i use it against them like if i'm mad at them i may purposely post something to triggure it which is mean but when you're mad at someone you want to get revenge no matter who you are
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
ya...
~Mandy~ says:
and i don't like doing that
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, but when your mad at someone it feels oh so good
~Mandy~ says:
yes but then i think about how later they'll read it and be hurt or even more angry... and i know i'd feel just as good if i just wrote it down somewhere and no one could see it but me
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
lol, ok, then me and you obviously dont see eye to eye on that
~Mandy~ says:
talk to me
~Mandy~ says:
you like them knowing what you think
Can you take it all away...this pain you gave to me... says:
yeah, thats what i always thought the point of a blog was
~Mandy~ says:
yea... which is one of the reasons i don't do what i just suggested
Sometimes I wish I could have this one place that no one knew about so I could just go there to be alone. I never get to be alone, ever and I don't even have my own room. In this house I feel like nothing I own is truely mine and mostly because of the privacy issue and that I've never bought anything with my own money because I don't really have my own money because I've never had a job. I even feel as though my bank account shouldn't be mine because my parents started it and since I've put birthday money in there every year. I think if I really want to find my own identity or something that's just mine I should get a job. Well I guess there's another reason I'm getting kicked off, to more impartial blogs! Ben's home.
Mandy ~ 7:39 PM