Who I Am
These are my true thoughts...
My Past
08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003
09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003
12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
02/01/2004 - 03/01/2004
03/01/2004 - 04/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
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10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
Favorite Websites
albinoblacksheep.com
www.myspace.com
www.ebaumsworld.com
Credits of the Creator
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Wednesday, November 24, 2004
Unrelenting Anger
Pissed
Won’t dismiss
My anger
Towards her
Her guilt
Won’t wilt
My emotions
She has no notion
Of what she’s doing
To me
Of what’s brewing
When she disagrees
This is a vacation?
Temptation
To rebel
Tell her to go to hell
Can’t subdue
My view
Her favoritism
Equals my cynicism
What if I just disappear?
I know, you’ll fear
Your reputation
With no explanation
You’ll lie
Like you always do
Apply
What you know isn’t true
Use your excuses
Which confuses
You
Words untrue
Dip deep
Deeper in your hole
Of deceit
When you keep repeating
Can’t stop
Forever on your treadmill
Of lies
Oh, yay. Another blog that didn't get posted. Another thing to just fucking piss me off aside from being denied having Job over for the first time in 2 weeks when Sarah's had Blaise over every night for the past couple of weeks up until last night when she said he couldn't come over. Then we have Kate who has Jake and Mike over whenever she pleases and doesn't even have to ask. Then there's Ben and the only reason he hasn't been having anyone over is because when he goes places he can drink and smoke. Here there are always those restrictions. I wish I could just go out and get hammered because I'm really getting sick of everything and almost everyone.
Job... my anti-everything... he's the only one there for me almost all of the time besides now when he can't be with me and other times when he has football or wrestling or something else family related. Being with him makes me feel the need for nothing else... I just feel completely satisfied when I'm with him just because I know those strong arms will hold me no matter what anyone else thinks, and those beautiful brown/hazel eyes will tell me of his sympathies and the smile which is almost exclusively mine will shine through my darkest emotions.
Then you put all of those together with many other very pleasant things and I’ve got the best thing in the world. Then knowing that leads to wanting it all the time and then having to restrict it to (at most) once a week and I guess this whole vacation I won’t see him and in that I wouldn’t even call it a vacation at all… merely a leave of absence. I’d rather be in school just so I know I can see him every day.
Oh the silent, written wish for needed comfort at times like these...
Pissed
Won’t dismiss
My anger
Towards her
Her guilt
Won’t wilt
My emotions
She has no notion
Of what she’s doing
To me
Of what’s brewing
When she disagrees
This is a vacation?
Temptation
To rebel
Tell her to go to hell
Can’t subdue
My view
Her favoritism
Equals my cynicism
What if I just disappear?
I know, you’ll fear
Your reputation
With no explanation
You’ll lie
Like you always do
Apply
What you know isn’t true
Use your excuses
Which confuses
You
Words untrue
Dip deep
Deeper in your hole
Of deceit
When you keep repeating
Can’t stop
Forever on your treadmill
Of lies
Oh, yay. Another blog that didn't get posted. Another thing to just fucking piss me off aside from being denied having Job over for the first time in 2 weeks when Sarah's had Blaise over every night for the past couple of weeks up until last night when she said he couldn't come over. Then we have Kate who has Jake and Mike over whenever she pleases and doesn't even have to ask. Then there's Ben and the only reason he hasn't been having anyone over is because when he goes places he can drink and smoke. Here there are always those restrictions. I wish I could just go out and get hammered because I'm really getting sick of everything and almost everyone.
Job... my anti-everything... he's the only one there for me almost all of the time besides now when he can't be with me and other times when he has football or wrestling or something else family related. Being with him makes me feel the need for nothing else... I just feel completely satisfied when I'm with him just because I know those strong arms will hold me no matter what anyone else thinks, and those beautiful brown/hazel eyes will tell me of his sympathies and the smile which is almost exclusively mine will shine through my darkest emotions.
Then you put all of those together with many other very pleasant things and I’ve got the best thing in the world. Then knowing that leads to wanting it all the time and then having to restrict it to (at most) once a week and I guess this whole vacation I won’t see him and in that I wouldn’t even call it a vacation at all… merely a leave of absence. I’d rather be in school just so I know I can see him every day.
Oh the silent, written wish for needed comfort at times like these...
Mandy ~ 10:56 AM